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Life/Love/Sex after commitment


What do you do to spice things up in your relationship after being in a committed monogamous relationship for years? Seems that now that me and my husband live together that all we really talk about is household needs, bills and how was your day blah blah blah… Don’t get me wrong my husband is my favorite man and he is super hot and no I couldn’t see myself with anyone else, but things seem like they are getting a little boring. What should we do? How can we get that fire back?


Well my first question Sis do you bring business into the bedroom? Do you have piles of bills on the dresser in the bedroom? Is the tv always on? Do you have young children that have access to your bedroom and/or bed at any given time? Ok so if you answered yes to these questions then guess what the bedroom is not your sensual oasis anymore. Time to change things up in that arena and Sensually fengshui your bedroom. Sensual colors deep reds lace or soft fabrics and light dimmers. Just a few examples also are you and hubby open to tantra tools, adult play chest, lingerie and or costume play. I’ve seen on a movie where a couple after two children had challenges getting their sex life back so they made a porn. Yes this seems a bit extreme for some though these times of video snapchat selfie everything everywhere a hot sex tape is nothing. haha Truthfully there are many different ways to spice up your love life and just the desire. Have you tried to dress up in a playful, sensual or kinky costume and strip tease for him. Or how about going out on the town dressing in a way you would have when you were single…taking seperate vehicles and meeting up at lounge for example and pretend you just met. Flirt with each other with eye contact first and then walk over and introduce yourself to one another like its the first time you are meeting this gorgeous human being, or reinact the first time you met or your first date. O dont forget to have passionate sex that night somewhere new in the car maybe behind the building of the resturaunt or in the bathroom of the club. Its ok if this seems a little to risky for you go home and have sex in the backyard underneath the stars, kitchen counter, shower or patio lovin.

Side note sacral chakra deals alot with our sensuality and sometimes combine that with either or root chakra or solar plexus things could get a little mucked up. Fears, traumas, hurt, etc could put us in a place where expressing our sexual self is more challenging than putting on a Red Pump and Lipstick.

So I suggest if you feel like you are having challenges opening up and lettign down your hair in the bedroom try lighting a red candle, red rose petals, Sensual body oil, sexy music, sexy lingeri, a glass of wine and whatever else gets you in the mood. This is where I say let the mood take you out of your elament and into a sensual fantasy world. Do this for yourself not for your partner yet. Twirl those hips twerk undress slowly and if you like watch yourself in the mirror as you do it all putting on a show for yourself, flirting and loving up on yourself kissing and touching yourself. This is to start up that intimate flow that will for sure lead you to feeling and acting a whole lot sexier.

Also there are certain tantra techniques that can help raise that sensual energy flow

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Love(Random Phrases)

 “I just want to have a completely adventurous, passionate, weird life.”

~Jeff Buckley

The love its trigger fits already spoken into existence,

far beyond infiltration heart makeup, bonding and fondness

here we go to the outer boundaries of fear and “tryjectory”~

(the force moving along a path of trying to get control of your focus)

and creation exists in the brain and energy centers

O that one frequency that turns you inside out

The energy center of reality

Here we go again laughter science and openness because

They say “People that are guarded are a afraid that you will see right through them”

their “faults” peculiarities something that makes them see not quite right.

that is why they hide behind secretes, meanness, O yea control and all those other

things that builds a mask and creates space between u them and the world.

Right like I was saying reality here we go again laughter science and Openness.

By Me


*Disclaimer this way of writing was inspired by Gertrude Stein
uh no its not exactly the same tho its something I worked into my own way of doing things.